Part 2, The Cost of Biblical Illiteracy on our Relationships

 

If a Christian has never dedicated any serious time to knowing God through His Word, their life will not look any different from an unbeliever’s. When this is the case, we miss out on all the blessings that come with Christian maturity. I want to show you that at times, the consequences of immaturity are serious. In the first message, we looked at potential consequences on our wellbeing. We saw that immature Christians may practice a false religion, they struggle to trust God in hard times, and when things get hard, they are more likely to turn their back on God. In this message, we will first see why we need the Bible to grow in our faith, then, we will look at the cost of Biblical indifference on our relationships.

First, we see that the Bible is spiritual food. I know an older gentleman who says he is a Christian. However, he refuses to talk about the Bible because there are so many opinions on every topic, he does not want to have any arguments. To avoid conflict, he says that his spouse and he hide the Bibles. This same person, before the presidential election, said they were spending hours and hours doing all their research so that he would be best equipped to pick the right candidate. I had to think to myself, people argue about politics all the time! If fear of debates stops a person from reading the Bible, why study politics? My second thought was, “why are you so motivated to study politics when you cannot find any time to get to know the God who made you!?” Is there anything in our lives that people around us can say we love more than the Bible? It could be sports, cooking, or another hobby. Many do not think they can understand what the Bible teaches. They wonder why they should waste time trying. Others think they do not need to read the Bible because they already know what the Bible teaches: “be good.” When we do not read the Bible miss out on Bible verses like Deut 8:3 “man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD.” We understand that we need food or our physical bodies would deteriorate. In God’s opinion, sustaining ourselves spiritually with the Bible is as important as the food we eat. If you have not read the Bible in a month, that is like fasting for a month. The goal of this series is to show you what happens when we miss too many spiritual meals. Generally, it leads to a lack of wisdom in different spheres of life. Not knowing the Bible does not mean we are not Christians, but how can we be sure? What is certain is that indifference toward the Bible affects our lives. Unwise choices can lead to a harder life. A harder life often affects our ability to witness. We become so consumed by our own situations we find it hard to bless others.

Biblical illiteracy affects our relationships, like marriage and then raising children. When we do not care about what the Bible teaches, we marry the wrong people. The Bible makes a huge deal out of who we marry. After following Jesus, for many people, choosing who you marry will affect your life more than any other decision. Marry the wrong person and there may be lifelong issues you have to deal with. You can marry a mature believer, who treasures Jesus above everything, and things can still go bad. However, in my experiences when Christian marriages generally turn sour, it is because the couple did not prioritize “love for Jesus” as a criterion in their choice of a spouse. Marrying an immature Christian is like marrying a non-believer. In the Bible, Deut 7:3–4 teaches: You shall not intermarry with them, giving your daughters to their sons or taking their daughters for your sons, ⁴for they would turn away your sons from following me, to serve other gods…” An illustration of this passage is King Solomon: 1 Kgs 11:1–4 ¹Now King Solomon loved many foreign women, along with the daughter of Pharaoh: Moabite, Ammonite, Edomite, Sidonian, and Hittite women,… ³… And his wives turned away his heart. ⁴For when Solomon was old his wives turned away his heart after other gods, and his heart was not wholly true to the LORD his God... The book of Proverbs addresses the issue of finding the right spouse at length. These proverbs are very male-centered but the truth applies for men finding wives and women finding husbands. Prov 12:4 An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones. Prov 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD. Prov 19:13 A foolish son is ruin to his father, and a wife's quarreling is a continual dripping of rain. ​Prov 21:9 It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife. Often when it comes to marriage, we are like Pharisees. We take a command of Scripture like, “we must marry in the Lord” (1 Cor 7:39; 2 Cor 6:14), and we ask how can I keep this command while continuing to live however I please. We look for the person we like the most who happens to be a believer and think God will not be bothered by our choice. All along, God never wanted us to marry someone who happens to be Christian, but someone whose Christian identity is their most striking characteristic. Illustration: A person once asked me what my opinion was about Christians dating non-believers. I said that if you are a follower of Jesus, he is the love of your life. He is the most important element of your life. If you are in a relationship with someone who does not know Jesus, how can that person truly know you? The only way a Christian and non-Christian can have a great relationship is if the Christian tones down their Christianity to a point where they are barely Christian at all. When I was done talking the person was not very impressed with my answer because they revealed they were currently dating non-Christian. I did not mean to offend, but I stand by my words.

For some of you, you do not need me to rub in the cost that you pay for being married to someone who does not love Jesus. For some of you, it may have been the cost you paid while being married to them in the past. For others, it may be the cost you are seeing your children or grandchildren pay in their choice of spouse. There are many verses that teach us to marry believers in the OT and the NT, but a list of rules is not what the Christian life is all about. Christians are transformed people. We have new hearts allowing us to delight in doing the will of God and he primarily wants us to be part of a worshipping community that loves God, loves each other, that seeks to bring the light of good news and selfless love to the world around us. How can you do any of that with a spouse that is not committed 100% to make that the priority of their own life? Being married to a non-believer or immature Christian affects our intimacy with God, the way we raise children, how we handle our finances, and even our ability to host in our homes for Kingdom of God matters!

Briefly, still under family relationships, I want to discuss the parents’ role in raising children in the ways of the Lord. When Christians are immature and do not love God’s Word, there is no intentionality in raising children in the ways of the Lord, other than forcing them to go to church once a week. Deut 6 makes it clear that it is the parents’ responsibility to disciple their child, not the church’s. If we do not know the Bible, we cannot teach our children. This is a huge cost.

The second effect on our relationships is on the Church. Biblical illiteracy hurts our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. Too often our view of salvation is selfish. In the most simplistic way, many think that because they believe in God, they get a pass to go to heaven when they die. Nothing else matters. Church is good if it improves your life, if it entertains, if it can lead you to improve your social life. The problem is that churches have people who will disappoint and so if we tie our church attendance to human performance we will end up being disappointed, attempt to change church, or perhaps just stop coming because we are just not benefitting enough. Most of us have siblings, children, nephews, or grandchildren who stopped attending church. Often, they still say they are Christian. They may well be, but often they are still infants in the faith who do not understand what the Bible teaches about the church. “Church,” “synagogue,” “assembly” all mean the same thing. They mean gathering. Israel went from a family to a nation when they came out of Egypt in the book of Exodus. The purpose of the Exodus and Israel’s salvation was so that they could be an assembly to worship God. The church, the synagogue, the assembly in the Bible is a gathering with the purpose of worshipping God. In the OT, they gathered on the Sabbath. The assembly occurred on a day kept completely distinct from all the other days of the week. In the Christian tradition, starting in the NT, Christians gathered on Sunday, the day of the resurrection and the day of Pentecost. We are more than saved individuals. We are saved to be part of God’s covenant community. One of the primary activities the people of God do is worship on Sunday. Being part of the covenant community affects our whole life because it is the primary community our families are part of. We gather on Sunday to praise the Lord in song, to be reminded of our identity as his people who are saved by grace alone, through faith alone, in Christ alone. We learn from God’s Word how to be more like Jesus in our daily lives and we are sent out into the world to be light wherever we go: sharing good news and considering other people’s needs as more important than our own.

We can be Pharisees about church attendance. We look at a biblical requirement and find how we can obey the letter while still living as we please. All over the world, people show up to church on Sunday, for one hour a week, but there is no more commitment. The tragedy is that every Christian has a spiritual gift to build up the church (1 Cor 14:12). When people are not committed, the whole church misses out on the person’s encouragement and gifts. Biblical illiteracy does not just hurt the individuals who do not know their Bible but the whole church.

Conclusion: At this point, you may be thinking, “okay, okay, I’m biblically illiterate, what do you want me to do?” Easy, read the Bible. Do it intelligently. This is how I started reading the Bible. I had a notebook and every time I had a question, I wrote it down. Writing down questions shows you care to understand what you read. Writing down a question places the problem on your radar so that when you are faced with the answer you will learn and remember it. I had so many notebooks with questions. From time to time, I would ask my questions to people at church. Sometimes they had answers, sometimes they did not. I found that often when I wrote a question down, I would find the answer in the Bible a few pages later.  I also had a study Bible that helped with complicated passages. This would be an investment of $20 to $45 dollars depending on which one you want. If money is a problem, let me know. Finally, you need to read in different ways. You may choose to read a book really quickly, 20 to 30 chapters in a day, and then try to summarize the book. If you struggle with a passage, other people can help, your study bible can help, other books can help. Do not do it alone. Other times you may choose to read a small book like James or Ephesians that you can read in 20 to 30 minutes. You may read it once a day for a week, and on a piece of paper, write everything it teaches about God, how it affects your relationship with Jesus, and all the things it teaches about how we should live differently. The Bible is a complicated and long book. But none of us have any excuse. Many people would love to help you learn more if you need help. Learning the Bible is a commitment, but there is a high cost on ourselves and others if we remain immature! One of the best ways of remembering what you read is by telling someone. You may have read 4 chapters that day, but something really struck you in your reading and inspired you, and so you contact a friend and tell them about what God has been teaching you. If you forget the Bible reading, you will remember that conversation with your friend!

Let us rejoice in the Lord, and seek him daily, and honor him by being conformed by his word, by reading it, meditating upon it, allow it to guide our ways for his glory! May our understanding of the Bible and an intimate relationship with God lead to strong Christian families and a strong, loving, Christian community in our church. Amen!